Sunday, May 18, 2008

Polepoke

So I got an iPhone this past January, and frankly, I love the damn thing - though whenever someone notices me using it I feel this guilty need to explain to whomever it is that I'm not an "Apple Guy," or one of those people that was camping outside an Apple store the night before the launch, live-blogging away, eagerly awaiting the opening of the store's doors and the grand spectacle of capitalism that would undoubtedly unfold. Thankfully, this explanation is never difficult, as the iPhone is more than just an expensive yuppie toy. It's got a host of features I use every day, from a real web browser, to the ability to check and write email, to being a fully-fledged MP3 player, etc. Plus, unlike Blackberries, it does this with an easy to use, aesthetically pleasing interface that's second to none.

What I hate about the iPhone, however, is its text messaging system. It's easy to use, sure, but it's got this insufferable auto-correct spelling feature. This is great if I mean to write "the" and accidentally tap out "teh." This happens occasionally, and the iPhone conveniently recognizes my obvious human error, and compensates for it. Where the iPhone goes from being a faithful little editor to a well-intentioned meddler is with slightly more esoteric words and phrases. For example, one evening I was bored and sent a text message to a female friend that I figured was also bored. There was no deep message or substantive dialog invovled. I simply wrote: "pokepoke." As in, "I'm poking you in the ribs to get your attention."

My faithful iPhone must have misinterpreted my motivation for sending this message and, without my knowledge, changed it from an innocent, charming "pokepoke" to the much more suggestive "polepoke." You can imagine the hilarity that ensued before I realized this error that my diligent, dutiful, but socially inept iPhone made on my behalf. This is just one example of many awkward situations that I've had to endure as a result of my confused little digital companion. Perhaps it's my fault for not quickly checking to make sure that what I wrote is actually what's being sent, but that shouldn't be my job. If I wrote something than that should be what's actually sent. I'm just glad I'm not using my iPhone to write this blog entry, otherwise the central theme of this post may have been translated to: "May you never find a live turtle in your soup."